Re: [Sheflug] Microsoft claims that Linux infringes 235 patents

[(Ted Harding) <ted.harding@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>]

On 16-May-07 10:26:30, Peter Humphrey wrote:
> On Tuesday 15 May 2007 11:16:27 Richard Ibbotson wrote:
> 
>> Looks like they are at it again :)
> 
> This has come up today and may be interesting:
> 
> http://www.theregister.co.uk/2007/05/16/ravicher_microsoft_oss_patent/

I have applied for (and expect to be granted) a Patent for the
Invention summarised below.

A System to Assist the Maintenance and Prolongation of Life
-----------------------------------------------------------
1. A Permeable Membrane which permits the exchange of molecules
   of gas between a volume of liquid in contact with one side of
   the Membrane and a volume of gas in contact with the other
   side of the Membrane.

2. A Preparation of Liquid which shall contain small particles
   ("Cells").

3. A design of Cells such that each cell may form a Bond with
   molecules of Gas, such Gas normally being either Oxygen or
   Carbon Dioxide, and the Bond being readily dissolved so that
   the Gas may be released.

4. A design for the formation of the Membrane into two bag-like
   Receptacles, connected to a system of tubular structures which
   communicate with a gaseous environment and thereby allow these
   gases to be brought into contact with one side of the Membrane.

5. A Mechanism consisting of contractile strips (of organic
   origin) mechanically linked to the Membrane which may according
   to control signals applied as described below cause the
   interior of the Receptacles to increase in volume (thereby
   drawing in gases from the environment) or decrease in volume
   (thereby expelling gases into the environment).

6. A Control System for the above Mechanism constructed from
   filaments (of organic origin) allowing electrochemical waves
   to pass from a Control Centre to the Mechanism, the Control
   Centre consisting of two Modules: one which is autonomous
   and homeostatic and controls the Mechanism in such a way as
   to maintain the levels of Oxygen and Carbion Dioxide in the
   Liquid between predetermined levels; and one which is under
   control of the Operator which can be used to over-ride the
   autonomous system.

7. The Principle of Operation of the System is that insufficienat
   Oxygen in the Liquid depresses and ultimately brings to a
   halt the processes of Life; whereas the processes of Life
   generate Carbon Dioxide to accumulate in the Liquid which
   both directly antagonises Life and also interferes with
   the Oxygen-carrying capacity of the Liquid. Whereby the 
   Invention to which the present Application applies serves
   to alleviate both threats to Life, in that:--
   7A. Under the control of the Control System described in (6),
   the Mechanism causes the Receptacles to expand and draw in
   Oxygen-containing gases; the Membrane as in (1) permits
   Oxygen molecules to be exchanged from the Gas to the Liquid;
   the Membrane permits Carbon-Dioxide molecules to be exchanged
   from the Liquid to the Gas.
   7B. Under the control of the Control System described in (6),
   the mechanism then causes the Receptacles to contract and
   expel the contained volume of gas to the exterior.
   7C. The cycle is then repeated from (7A).

================================================================

There, I've just patented breathing. In due course, somebody
will come and look for money to pay for people's use of this
patented process. If you take no action now, you may find that
you face unaffordable accumulated dues, together with costs and
penalties. Therefore you are advised to take action now to
register your use of the System described above. In order to
encourage timely registration, a special rate will be applied
for a time-limited period.

Until midnight on 06 July 2007, users may register their use of
the System at the special reduced rate of 0.05 pence (0.0005 GBP)
per cycle of the System as described in (7) above, and this
rate will remain in force in perpetuity for registrations received
by the aforesaid time. Thereafter, the applicable rate will be
0.1 pence (0.001 GBP) per cycle.

Dues should be transferred by Direct Debit to:

  G. Brown Enterprises, Public Private Partnerships,
  11 Downing Street
  LONDON




--------------------------------------------------------------------
E-Mail: (Ted Harding) <ted.harding@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Fax-to-email: +44 (0)870 094 0861
Date: 16-May-07                                       Time: 13:27:42
------------------------------ XFMail ------------------------------

_______________________________________________
        Sheffield Linux User's Group
  http://www.sheflug.org.uk/mailfaq.html
 GNU - The choice of a complete generation